The next book that I’m planning to write has the working title ‘Straight Talk: conversations that scare you’.
I’ve been doing some research for it with my clients and recently asked them to send me outlines for conversations that they think are scary. I’ve been blown away by the number who replied and by the detail of some of the replies. It looks like there are a lot of conversations that people are afraid of but in which they wish they knew how to speak up!
The majority seem to be when you have something to say but you’re afraid that you will damage the relationship if you speak up. So you bite your lip and hold back your frustration, anger or hurt.
If you’d like to be part of the research for the book, send me some of your scariest conversations. They may be conversations you walked away from; or ones when you spoke up, but too late, wished you hadn’t. They may be conversations facing you right now. You can also ask your friends for their worst conversations!
Here are some areas in which you may have ideas.
•Colleagues at work who drive you crazy
•Your toxic boss
•Neighbours from hell
•Friends who take advantage of you
•Conversations that make or break relationships
•Conversations in families; with partners, children and in-laws
•Conversations about your children (with child minders, teachers, doctors, other parents)
•In your social life; sports clubs, book clubs, PTAs
Are there conversations you’re scared of?
Send your ideas for inclusion in the research for the next book on Straight Talk.
June 4th, 2010 at 12:44 pm
Hi, Maureen. This one I can relate to. As a Trustee in a Sectional Titles Village, I sometimes have to speak to residents who have contravened one of our rules. Easy enough when the person concerned is a mature, well-balanced, unself-centered, unbiaised person - but few people are. The defensive response is bad enough, but the worst are those who respond by attack. Example: someone servicing their car on the common property, allowing oil to flow all over the roadway. When approached - Oh, so politely - this chap opened up with all guns, with a barage of complaints about an unrelated subject (Village security).