It sounds so easy. Facts are facts, that is, until we feel strongly about something. Then emotions take over, and not even facts are what they seem. There are four common mistakes that we make.
1. We load the facts with emotional baggage. The emotional tone of a statement is most often carried in the non verbal signals that accompany the words. You may choose your words carefully, with the full intention to have an open discussion about something, but the tone, pitch and loudness of your voice all give away your true intent...to accuse or blame. Gestures such as finger pointing, raising eyebrows and frowning, add to the effect. Standing up, pacing around, and waving your arms make the message unmistakable. The open discussion becomes attack and defense. A delegate on a workshop recently
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