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"If you do that one more time…" - March 2008 |
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It's interesting how the conversations that people bring to Straight Talk workshops change from year to year. Recently, it seems like everyone is moving office, or more accurately, moving from an office into an open plan environment: often, with much trepidation!
In an open plan office, knowing how to speak up when the person next to you is driving you crazy becomes an important skill. Mostly, we don’t say anything at all. We’re scared that we will say the wrong thing, cause offense and just make matters worse. However, long days spent close beside a person with personal habits you find irritating or distasteful can become very, very stressful. It can be the rave music ring tone on their mobile set at max, or the way they shriek hello to their friends: it can be a personal hygiene issue or an irritating laugh or cough: it might be the smell of garlic salami at mid morning or the takeaway cartons that are left around after lunch.
Setting the right tone in the opening to any of these conversations is vital. “Can we chat about something that’s a bit personal” would do the trick. Then describe the behaviour that concerns you, keeping it short and simple. “I notice that in the mornings you eat garlic sausage.” Now express your concern. “I know it must sound stupid, but I’ve never liked the smell of garlic”. Finally, ask if you can talk it through together, “Could we try and agree something that will work for both of us here?
A conversation like this is not easy but with some planning is certainly possible. The rewards for having it are better working conditions, better working relationships and a whole lot less stress. Doesn’t that make it worth trying?
If you would like help with one of your own conversations, send a mail to maureen@gateways.co.za.
In return you will receive a template you can use to plan your conversation and feedback by e-mail on how you have used it.
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