Straight Talk Tips are produced monthly, highlighting aspects of the Straight Talk approach to effective communication. They serve as reminders of the process for those who have been through the Straight Talk training. They are also an introduction to the concepts on which Straight Talk is based.
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So you have someone on your team who is not performing? You can see it on the monthly report and you know they receive the same data. You hoped that by now they would have taken action. You did drop a hint some time ago that things weren't as they should be, but it had no effect. |
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It starts with a mediocre performance review, the kind where you sense there's something you're not being told. Then you find that you have been left off the project that was agreed as part of your development plan. You suspect that things are happening that don't include you, and you realize you were the last to hear of the changes in company strategy. You're working harder than ever and yet you seem to have lost focus. You're feeling exhausted, anxious and apprehensive, but your boss never seems to have time to talk to you. And now it's the last day of the month and he wants to see you urgently... |
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Do you know that if you type "toxic people" into Google you come up with 18,100 000 hits! That's a lot of toxicity. You're probably working with some of these people right now. There's the victim; the one who blames and complains about everything that isn't working in his life, including his job performance. He loves to share his frustrations, but takes no steps to resolve any of it. Favourite phrase? "Yes, but…" Then there are the needy ones whose conversations centre only on themselves, draining energy and life out of everyone around them. How about the person who is always right and loses no opportunity to tell you? A conversation with her is so exhausting that it's easier to give up and just listen. And the boss who tells you that his criticism is for your own good, when he reprimands you or puts you down in front of others! |
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For most of us the thought of confrontation sits up there with going to the dentist, making an off-the-cuff speech or being summoned by our bank manager. What are we scared of? Are we afraid that our emotions will run away with us when we feel strongly about issues? Are we scared of exposing ourselves to counter attack? Is it the knowledge that the stakes are high and relationships may be at risk? Or is it that we just don’t know how to handle confrontations with people whose view of the world is very different from ours? |
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A New Year, and essentially there’s only two choices. You can settle for more of the same or you can create something different. |
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So you do talk straight? Many of us do indeed talk straight. We identify problems, decide on solutions, allocate responsibilities, communicate it all to our people with standards and deadlines … but the job doesn’t get done! Management would be easy if only people would do what they have been told to do. |
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When you have a really good working relationship with someone, you can move mountains. You trust and support one another, you can anticipate problems; communication is often unspoken. When a relationship is poor, we try to ignore it, focus on the job, and hope that the problem will resolve itself. This seldom works; communication becomes more strained; getting results becomes more difficult. Often the only thing to do is take time out and fix the relationship. Once that’s done, you can get on with moving mountains. |
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It’s spring: time to clear out gardens and garages: time to sort through debris and clutter: time to set things right as the seasons move on. Perhaps a time to apply the same logic to our lives and relationships: definitely a time for some straight talk! |
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We need to initiate conversations in different ways to solve performance problems at different levels. |
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How do others see you? Being approachable is an important component of emotional intelligence and a key leadership competency. How approachable are you? Think how your colleagues and the people who report to you would respond to the items below. |
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